Hey, mariadismondy blog readers! Thanks for allowing me the opportunity to ‘guest’ blog. My name is Leslie Bosscher and my blog,www.lesliedishes.com started out as a ‘mommy’ blog but in the past 6 years, it’s taken on a life of it’s own.
In the spirit of back to school, I seem to get on my soapbox a lot, as it pertains to helicopter moms. What is a helicopter mom, you ask? A helicopter mom is the mother that essentially hovers over her children, not allowing them the personal space they need to become self reliant, independent people. A helicopter moms oversees and facilitates every facet of their childrens’ lives to the point where the child can barely function without their mother’s guidance. Ugh… The reason I often rant about the helicopter mom is not only because it hinders the child’s natural problem solving skills, but also because the teachers are also affected by said mother.
Let me start by saying, I always tip my hat to teachers. The fact that they spend all day every day nurturing, caring for and teaching our children is enough, but then to have to deal with the omnipresent moms on top of that? Not cool. I always say, “LET THE TEACHERS TEACH!” Quit calling them over every, single, little issue. Don’t challenge their every move, respect their decision and support it. Obviously, no one knows your child better than you do, but you’re not the one with a Master’s degree in elementary education and you’re his mom, NOT HIS TEACHER, so let the teacher do what she was trained to do and give her the space she needs to do her job.
With that said, I bring you……
I wanted to volunteer every day up at my kids’ school, I’d have become a teacher.
If I wanted to be overly involved in my kids’ classroom, I’d have home schooled them.
If I wanted to manage every single school committee and fund raising opportunity, I’d have chosen to work for a living.
If you noticed that I only sporadically volunteer at my boys’ school, good for you. I didn’t overlook anything. I simply chose not to attend every God forsaken event. If everyone did a little bit, the world would be a happier place. Instead of 3 people doing everything and then bitching about it. (martyr moms)
If you wonder why I don’t make waves up at the school, it’s because my kids are well adjusted and they actually do fairly well without my constant hovering.
If you’re wondering what I do “all day” while my kids are in school. Don’t. I’m generally pretty busy with my own…you know, life. And I don’t feel one bit guilty about this either. Neither should any of the other parents who beat themselves up for not being a permanent presence at school. Whether you work from home or still have little ones to take care of, don’t let anyone dictate how often you should volunteer. It’s no one’s business. Hell, spend your day sleeping for all anyone should care. You don’t owe anyone an explanation!
My social life is my social life. My sons have their own. Rarely do they intersect. While, I will happily facilitate my kids’ social lives and/or attend an occasional school function, I would hardly consider this part of my social repertoire. I mean, I do my part and all, but I’m not going to win any spirit award.
Moms, when you back off a little bit, you might actually find out that your child will get along just fine without you. They’ll get placed into the right classroom without your demanding letters and phone calls to the principal. The teacher likely knows what she’s doing without your constant input. Your son or daughter will probably find her own way without you navigating her. The longer you hover, the liklihood of you winding up with a 40 year old living in your basement grows exceedly.
That is all. Enjoy the rest of your summer! And when the 2012-2013 school year begins, let us celebrate like our mothers did….by drinking cocktails and playing bridge all day! No? Oh, maybe that was just my mom. Either way, thanks for reading! 🙂
I am working with Leslie on a project of hers that is in the works as a part of my consulting business. She is truly one-of-a-kind and I know we will be hearing and seeing a lot more of her in the future! For now, check her out as the star in this “stuff” PTA moms say video.